Jokes and “Favorite” Phrases

So a battery walks into a bar and the man points to a sign,


and the battery says, “Aw, c’mon man, I just want one drink.” The man says, “Well, okay, but don’t you start anything!

(this is the one and only joke that Emily knows)

In the years leading up to our official start to homeschool this fall, it never occurred to me that Emily, would ever declare “she didn’t want to learn.”

But she did.

And what is it with that word every parent hates to hear?

“I’m BORED.”

Or how about “I don’t want to [fill in the blank].”

Is it too late to remove those words and phrases from her vocabulary? Can I actually pass a law and make them illegal for her to say?

Seriously, it drives me nuts. I’m millimeters away from declaring daily limits on these phrases. “You get three ‘I don’t want to’ and two ‘I’m bored’ and then it’s off to your room young lady! I’ve had enough!”

Yeah, that will go over well.

Another one that has started up is the classic, “You just don’t understand me.” So, five years old, and going on fifteen. [sigh]

Despite this, we adore her, and she adores us. Each night we settle down for bed, us in our bed, her in a little cot against the far wall. For the last eight months or so, this has been our routine since nightmares became a nightly occurrence. At this point, I wonder if she will ever sleep in her bed again.

It gets quiet, and then she says, “Do you want to hear a joke? So, a battery walks into a bar…”

I’m getting a joke book at the library this week. Seriously. She needs a better repertoire to choose from!

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